Love is our Nature, not a Commodity

Love is a grand and wonderful thing. It has been exalted, suffered, and written and sung about since the beginning of time.

The meaning of Love and the expression of romantic relationship has evolved and grown with changing needs, religions, and economic conditions. It is a great challenge for individuals and cultures to change traditions and morals to keep pace with the evolution of the human dream. I can think of no area of our western society more in need of change than this, and at the same time more resistant to that change. There is probably no emotion more misunderstood, distorted, and confused than "Love."

From the experiences of childhood most of us agreed that others were the source of love, and that you had to bargain for that love. Love became a commodity that lived outside of us, we needed it to survive, and we had to be good and get it right in order to assure our share of the precious commodity.

I believe we came into this world through Love, as Love, being Love. We were the manifestation of Life itself. You came here knowing no fear, judgment, no conditions, an had no expectations. You simply WERE. In order to gain the acceptance of parents, teachers, playmates, and religious leaders, we learned to deny our truth and accept theirs. The first truth we had to deny was the truth that we were and ARE Love.

As we moved into adult "love" relationships, if we carry with us the agreement that love is a commodity outside of us that we have to bargain for, we will always live in fear of failing and losing the love we have captured. This is not fun (you may have noticed).

It is my hope, inspiration, and intent,

to always know my nature as love and life itself, 

and share that love in all my relationships.

I do not bargain for love,

and I do not require others to bargain for my love.

What about you?

    Allan

I adapted the above thoughts from my Five Agreements to Make Love Come True -- there is a lot more there to read. Changing these agreements will be a major focus of our week together in Chacala during my Valentine's Week Relationship Retreat. Please join me, and change your life!

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Domestication: Downloading the Dream

Who Were You When You Were Born?

You were born into this world as a "bundle of joy." Your mind was free of stories, and you were happy - without even knowing what happiness was. You had no opinions, no fears, no expectations, and no judgments. There was no distorting light in your channels of perception. You had no words yet for colors, sounds, objects, or Mom's bad hair day. You had no concept of good and bad or right and wrong.

You simply existed, in a sea of stimulations and events that you experienced directly, just as they were. Your mind had no experience with naming, categorizing, or separating any of this incoming light. You were simply present, in each moment, without self-awareness. You did not even know you had been given a name or gender identity.

You were actually like a little Toltec master or guru, present in each and every moment, living in the bliss of love and acceptance. If you could have talked and described your experience, spiritual seekers would have come from miles around to sit at your feet and learn from you.

In those first few months of your life, you lived in the bliss of the oneness that gurus teach and to which spiritual seekers aspire. Because you had not yet learned the fears and judgments of the adult world, your nature was openness and love. Your innocence was like that of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden.

~ An excerpt from The Everything Toltec Wisdom Book, by Allan Hardman

Interested in what happened to all of us along the way, and how you can reclaim your innocence and joy? Learn about Domestication and Dreaming - read Allan's article, "The Perfect Dream."

A New Year's Blessing Prayer

I am loving my winter in Chacala, Nayarit, Mexico. If you are in a cold place somewhere, I am going to send you some soft warm tropical air....hold on....close your eyes....hold out your heart....aah...there it is.

Take a moment and let it in...let it warm your heart and soul....and prepare you for the new year ahead. I encourage us all to open our hearts to ourselves (especially) and to each other as we make this transition into 2011. I've heard some folks here say: "New Year's Eve is no big deal, and I'll just go to bed early."

Well, fine, however, we can use any excuse to set new intentions and clean up our minds so we can live happier, more creative, and loving lives each day and each year.

I have a simple secret for setting intentions and changing beliefs: Take out the "can't, shouldn't, don't, never" and other black magic words that limit your creation. Example: "I can't find a job." Change your Word to "I find a job." Or, "I'll never find the perfect relationship." Try this, instead: "I'll find the perfect relationship." Or, a bit more creative: "I am the perfect relationship." Or, riffing, "I am in the perfect relationship with myself, one based on unconditional love and acceptance of my divine perfection." THAT oughta' do it.

Happy New LIFE!

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I'm really looking forward to my annual Valentine's Week Workshop on Love, Romance, and Relationship, February 10~14, 2011 (for couples and singles) here at my "House of the Eagles" in Chacala. Chacala is a wonderful and romantic setting for this five-day exploration into conscious relationship, and I hope you'll make plans to be here. You deserve an uplifting and life transforming vacation, don't you think? Click here for more details.

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"A New Year's Blessing Prayer ~ I Fling My Heart Open to Thee"

Divine Presence, I fling my heart open to thee.

Show me the way to your perfect Grace.

I dance with thee in this New Year.

My heart is open wide, and your love pours through me,

And I see your love in all that is.

I see your love in my Beloveds,

In the rain and sun and wind and heat and cold.

I see your love in all success and adversity,

I see your love in every aspect of your Creation.

I say YES to all that is, knowing it is all You.

In this New Year, may I let nothing obscure my vision of you,

And your Grace.

My eyes are open wide, and my heart is ripped open

In my desire to be possessed by you.

Take Me, Take Me, Take Me.

I have nothing to surrender, because all that I AM is You.

Divine Presence, I fling my heart open to thee.

Show me the way to your perfect Grace.

I dance with you in this New Year.

And so it is.

~Allan