The True Meaning of Forgiveness

"The True Meaning of Forgiveness"

Most religions and spiritual paths include some sort of system or expectation of forgiveness. Very often, unfortunately, these ideas of forgiveness include judgement and a sense of victimization: "You are a __________, and you have hurt me, but I forgive you." Someone once said (or maybe oftener) that everything after the word "but" in a sentence is a lie. In this case, I believe that is true. This is not real forgiveness, it is a generosity for the sake of appearing pious for the sake of the other person, the Judge Within, or God -- or all at once.

So what is true forgiveness? What better description could we find than in my new Everything Toltec Wisdom Book. . .??!!

"In the old dream, there is a "forgiveness" that is actually based on personal importance. It says: "You have hurt me, I judge and condemn you, but I am a better person than you, so I will forgive you." There are many variations on this theme, but they all reflect the old dream of wrongdoing, judgment, and victimization. It is not actually forgiveness at all.

When a Toltec Warrior clears an incident with recapitulation, there is no longer any hurt, no perpetrator, and no victim. The entire incident is released. There is no need to forgive, because from the eagle's perspective, there is no offense to be punished or forgiven. There is no blame. In the Toltec wisdom, this is the true forgiveness, knowing there is nothing to forgive.

This forgiveness results from a change of the assemblage point away from victim and perpetrator to the eagle's view of the perfection of the universe. The cleansing power of this truth releases poison from old emotional wounds. When the warrior applies the poultice of self-love to those cleansed wounds, they heal with only the trace of a scar. When someone touches that place, there is no longer a need to protect it, so the warrior can step forward with his arms wide open to embrace the world."

In the story of Jesus, they say he looked down from his cross, and said "Forgive them father, they know not what they do." Isn't this the message of true forgiveness? We are all doing our best, and sometimes we may react to others as though they deliberately hurt or betrayed us. The Toltec Warrior knows that this universe one big system of actions and reactions. Everything is in contact and changing and acting and reacting everywhere in every time.

There is no where that one action begins (perpetration) and ends (victimization). Everything is acting on everything else, constantly. In that action/reaction you can see the Divine Perfection of each and every movement in the matrix of our world.

There are many days set aside to focus on Forgiveness. Global Forgiveness Day is on August 27, 2008, World Forgiveness Day is March 3, and October 4, is International Forgiveness Day. If you are not ready to forgive yet, you can always wait until Regular Forgiveness Day, on June 26th. Of course these dates may change depending on what organization is promoting them.

Perhaps every day can be your Personal Forgiveness Day. You can begin with the self-forgiveness that says, "I am always doing my best. I am not bad or wrong. I am the only Me there is, and I am being the perfect Me." From that place of self-acceptance, you can accept not only yourself but all of Creation. After all, Creation is doing its best being itself, too.

You are forgiven.

This post is adapted from my Joydancer Weekly Word and News e-newsletter of August 3, 2007. To subscribe, go to my homepage at www.joydancer.com.

Celebrating This Winter Solstice

THIS OFFERING ABOUT USING THE WINTER SOLSTICE IS A GIFT FROM FRANK HAYHURST, aka FRANCIS RICO, A TEACHER IN THIS TRADITION FROM SONOMA COUNTY, CA. . .
It is good advice for anytime, of course:

Beloved fellow travelers of the mystery trend:

Creation offers to share with us her gift of expansion of light, a gift 14
billion years in the making - a gift that is now appearing it's full
blazing glory this Friday, December 21st, at 10:08PM Pacific Standard Time.
(Work it out for your time zone.)

You might ask "how can we possibly share in this cosmic gift, considering
the toxic mess we humans are making of this little planet?"

A native holy man, Joseph Rael - "Beautiful Painted Arrow" - had a vision
of this moment, and he puts it this way:

"We humans have fooled around long enough, and God is now taking over. From
now on, we are going to get plenty of everything we focus on and act on. If
we focus on conflict, we will get more conflict. However, if we focus on
peace we will get plenty of peace. As soon as we focus on a goal, the
universe will take us in that direction."

So, a good question would be: What do you intend for yourself?

It is a wonderful opportunity we are being given! We are "presents" from
Creation to Herself. And, this Solstice Celebration is like a party at
which we are invited to open our present, to open to the precious gift that
we are, opening to find the deep wisdom and freedom that wrap the wild and
beautiful truth of our selves.

Could this be done anywhere, anytime? Yes.

However, with the spiraling energy of our Earth circling our Sun, in a
spiraling galaxy within an expanding cosmos -- well, you get the picture,
this Solstice is a special moment of whirling dancing Light -- of Light
returning to grow the seeds of intent that you select.

Another good question would be: What do you intend to grow in the Fields of
Light of your life?

On Friday evening, create a ceremony, a celebration, with friends. Make it
a party, a SERIOUS party! It is respectful to our hostess, Creation, to
align ourselves with her, leaving the petty hierarchies of humankind out on
the porch, like muddy shoes that are not invited inside.

Move into silence. Let Creation speak within your heart.

Then, CELEBRATE! Share this good fortune, this opportunity to live wild and
free, with all of our relations, our friends, families, neighbors, and ALL
who we share this gift of life with.

As you plant, so shall you reap. It has always been this simple, but as of
now, it is simple to the tenth power!

love you! Many blessings!

Frank - Francis Rico

The Secret About Dreaming

In a recent post, I shared some of my “Secrets about The Secret.” I am pleased (of course) to hear from so many of you that agreed with my observations. You shared your experiences as friends and therapists listening to people’s self-judgment for failing to manifest the perfect life, and you shared your own frustrations from trying to use the ideas of The Secret and The Law of Attraction to change your circumstances.

Let us not use these criticisms of the latest pop-culture ideas about how to strike it rich (in money, love, and body perfect) to obscure a very important reality: You do manifest the universe you live in through how you dream it. What do I mean, and why is that different than The Secret?

Basic “Dreaming 101:” You do not see “what is out there.” The light you perceive reflects off the objects in the universe, and enters your mind through your eyes and other senses, and creates a little virtual reality in your mind. The image you see is in your mind, not out there in the universe. That is an amazing and indisputable fact: You only see what is in your mind’s virtual reality, not what is out in the world.

In the Toltec tradition, we call this virtual reality in your mind your “Personal Dream.” You are dreaming reality. Your body is an organ of perception—it collects data from the world around you. That information passes through “channels of perception” in your mind, picking up stored information made up of biases, agreements, emotional memories, fears, traumas, desires, belief systems, and all the knowledge stored in your mind.

That stored information distorts the incoming messages carried on the light, and it is the distorted light that creates the virtual reality dream. You look at that dream and think you are seeing “out there.” You are not. You are dreaming. We could call your mind an organ of “deception,” since it creates the distorted dream of a world that has nothing to do with what is really out there.

“The Secret” says that (simply stated) if you can think the right thoughts you will attract to yourself the right things. The Law of Attraction says that like attracts like. Miguel Ruiz, in The Four Agreements, tells us: Always Be Impeccable With Your Word. He explains that your Word is every thought, action, spoken word, and your most deeply held beliefs.

In other words, your Word is how you dream. Your dream was programmed into your mind from the very beginnings of your awareness. You were taught what was right and wrong, good and bad, who was Us and who was Them. All that stored information and knowledge, which you continued to add to and refine all of your life, is the dream of the world you live in.

The dream in your mind out-pictures itself into what appears to be Reality. If you dream that money is hard to get, so it shall be. If you dream that love is dangerous, you will attract dangerous love. If you believe you are not worthy of kindness and consideration, you will attract abuse and hurt. If you believe you have a Parking Fairy, you will believe the Fairy finds you parking places. It has nothing to do with the nature of the world or your ability to create it, but you will accumulate evidence for the truth of how you dream by what your dream creates—in the dream! None of it happens out there. Am I making sense?

Yes, it is true that your thoughts create your reality—but only in your mind. That is the only place that the universe you live in exists. Yes, there is a universe there, but you cannot perceive it. You can only dream. Everyone lives in a distinctly different universe.

If you can do your deep inner work, clean out the memories, traumas, old belief systems and agreements, etc, from your channels of perception . . .if you can clear away the conflicting desires and the resistance in your programming . . .if you can let go of any attachments to the outcome of your manifesting . . .then perhaps you can make these laws of The Secret work for you. If you get that clear, you probably won’t care about manifesting riches.

Of course, there is always the issue of the Action/Reaction nature of the universe to deal with. Everything is in action all the time everywhere, reacting with everything else in the nonexistent universe. Where does your power and influence begin?

We can come back to that part of the conversation next time.

Thanks for reading.

This post was adapted from "The Weekly Word and News," my e-newsletter from Joydancer.com.

My Secrets About The Secret

“The Secret” and “The Law of Attraction” are the Big Buzz these days, and I am sure that many of you reading this are big fans. I think it is great that so many people are interested in ways to take responsibility for their lives using the power of their minds. I have a few thoughts to share with you about the other side of the teachings, and things to watch out for while practicing the principles.

In the book, The Secret, it says: “The Secret is the law of attraction! It has been . . .hidden, lost, stolen, and bought for vast sums of money. . .Everything that’s coming into your life you are attracting into your life. . .whatever is going on in your mind you are attracting to you. . . As you learn The Secret, you will come to know how you can have, be, or do anything you want.”

Here are some of my secrets about The Secret:

1. It is not a secret.

People have been writing books about how your mind affects your reality since the beginning of books. Jesus and Plato talked about it. Toltec Nagual and author of The Four Agreements, Miguel Ruiz wrote about it. Most of the authors and experts quoted in the movie and book have been writing about it for a long time.

That has nothing to do with the value of The Secret, it only points out the hype factor, which you may have noticed is pretty big. For many people, being able to have power over their lives and the choices they make is a big revelation. This is an important value of The Secret.

2. It does not always work.

If only it were as simple as “what you think, you get” and all you have to do is think good positive spiritual thoughts and your life would be devoted to what the book offers: “. . .eradicating disease, acquiring massive wealth, overcome obstacles, and achieving what many would regard as impossible.”

In The Four Agreements Miguel Ruiz invites us to be impeccable with our Word, because the Word is the creative force of the universe. He includes in the Word every thought, belief, action, and spoken word. It is the most deeply held beliefs and agreements that are this creative force. Affirmations on the bathroom mirror often do not change us, because there are other agreements that are held deep in the subconscious that are the creative forces in our universe.

It is true that our own personal universe is created by our thoughts, but we usually don’t even know what our thoughts are; or especially, how they are creating the world we live in.

3. It can be a big set-up for self-judgment.

If you see a movie or read a book and it tells you that you have the power to create any life you want, to create wealth and overcome disease and find the perfect relationship. . .well, it sounds great, of course, but if it doesn’t work. . .wow! This is a big set-up for The Judge. They say you can do this if you just do it right. You try, you apply the principles as you understand them, maybe some things work, and maybe you can’t get so much as a good parking space, let alone the riches and love!

The Inner Judge loves those moments, and will use them against you. Don’t let The Secret become another “should” -- like the latest diet you couldn’t stick with, or the gym membership that you never use.

If it were as easy as they say, everyone would be healthy, wealthy, and loved beyond measure.

This, to me, is the most important secret about The Secret: It is not that easy, and it is not your (spiritual) fault if it does not work the way it is advertised.

4. You might not actually have any choice.

This is really a subject worthy of a more thorough exploration than we can give it here, but let me say that The Secret works for those it works for. Their minds and belief systems are prepared in some way for what The Secret offers. For minds that are not prepared, the principles have no place from which to operate.

Again, if it worked as simply for everyone as advertised, we would all be there already. Enjoy The Secret and The Law of Attraction—and do it without any expectations that you should be able to quickly change your entire life and become rich and healthy because you changed your thinking. It is simple, it is true, and it is not easy.

Do your best, and accept yourself just the way you are. The rest is play.

Have fun!

The Hidden Power of Miguel Ruiz' Four Agreements.

It has been ten years since Miguel Ruiz, author and Toltec Nagual, released his famous book, The Four Agreements - A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom. Oprah has raved about it, movie stars quote it, and it is read in 32 languages around the world-- and yet many people miss some of the profound depths of this teaching.

Miguel Ruiz begins The Four Agreements by describing how each of us has been "domesticated" by our parents, relatives, siblings, teachers, church leaders, and others. We were expected to agree with their beliefs and agreements about good and bad, and right and wrong - and we did. We had no choice. It was "their way or the highway."

We agreed never to take the last cookie, to always put other people's feelings ahead of ours, to follow the rules, not touch ourselves there, and not talk back. We agreed to stay inside the lines, not be too happy, and always be nice. Following their rules helped us fit in and get our needs met.

Following their rules also had a price: We were required to abandon our truth and the freedom to express ourselves freely. We stopped looking inside for our direction, and learned to look outside to know what "they" wanted us to think and feel. This was a big price to pay for safety and belonging. We had no choice.

The Four Agreements have the power to break thousands of the limiting agreements that you made during your domestication, and set you free to be yourself. They are a wonderful gift. Unfortunately, many people misunderstand the deeper meaning of the agreements, or deny their power by imagining they are like some other philosophy or teaching. Let's take a brief look at each agreement here, and make sure you are using them as the powerful tools they are.

Agreement #1: Always be impeccable with your Word. Miguel Ruiz clearly explains that to be impeccable means to be "without sin," and he defines sin as "going against yourself." Therefore, to be impeccable with your Word is to not use your Word against yourself. Many people seem to miss this definition, and believe the agreement means they should always tell the truth, keep their commitments, and not cheat.

Your Word is a powerful force of creation in your life. How do you use your Word against yourself? The most common way is to judge yourself. The voices of your domesticators follow you around, critcizing what you do or don’t do, and how you do or don’t do it.

Can you imagine living without ever judging yourself for anything you say or do? Imagine your freedom to take action, to create, and to love with your heart wide open. Keeping this one agreement is all you need to go all the way to personal freedom. It is very simple, but not easy. The old habits are hard to break, but you can do it. The Toltec Path has many powerful tools that can help you identify and break the agreements that do not serve you, and I will be describing many of them here.

The other three agreements are given to us as support for the first.

Agreement #2: Don't take anything personally. The danger here is using this agreement as an attitude, rather than a ticket to freedom. The Toltec Wisdom teaches that we are all distorting reality based on our unique beliefs and agreements. Everyone is dreaming you, they are not seeing the real you. Therefore, anything they say to or about you is a description of their dream of you, and truly has nothing to do with you. Likewise, you are dreaming everyone else, and your dream of them has nothing to do with them. The universe it not personal. Be yourself, and enjoy your life.

Agreement #3: Never make assumptions. What a powerful invitation! Stay in the moment. Don't second-guess life. Don't assume you know what someone needs or is thinking. If you want to know, ask. This agreement will break all those lies that say it is bad to ask questions because you might embarrass or hurt someone, or you should know what other people are thinking and meet their needs before they have to ask. Many people think this is a minor agreement, but don't be fooled. Big power resides here. Stay in the juice of Life in this moment-- after all, this moment is the only time and place Life is happening!

Agreement #4: Always do your best. This agreement is often misunderstood to mean you should try harder, do more, and be better. Nothing could be farther from the intention of the agreement. Every choice you make is based on your programming, your previous experiences, and the information available to you-- and every choice is the best you can make in the moment. If you find out ten minutes or ten years later that you have other options, use them, act, change, and grow.

This agreement will break your belief in all the lies your inner and outer judges tell you about your failures, what you should have known or done better, and the grim prospects for your future. Without the voice of your inner judge you are free to be you. What a beautiful thing to behold.

Yours IN love and The New Dream,

Allan